pious: out of the pew and into the party

this is the title that my brain came up with in a dream.

the dream was really long and mostly full of nonsense, including a part where gabrielle from xena knocked on my car window in the middle of an ohio wheat field and offered me a half eaten fudgesicle.

at the end of the dream i was in a room of people who didn't know each other very well and we were playing a horrible charades/20 questions/hangman fusion mixer game. each person had to go to the front and get the audience to guess the title of their life memoir as it would be titled at that particular moment.

gabrielle appeared because i've been watching too much xena before bed.

the title came from i don't know. talking about my sunday school feltboard halloween costume? recent conflict with my family? pressure to come up with a concise bio for the doula collective?

it happened right before i woke up. i googled it because i thought maybe i read it somewhere, but i didn't find anything.

i've heard that dreams are where you process what you haven't processed consciously. i've also heard that they're an alternate reality. and also that what we think is real is our brain tricking us. and that our whole existence might be controlled by another reality beyond us. like sims.

i don't know anything about sims, except that yesterday leslie told me that one of her sims characters was about to have a baby. which is funny, because i'm on call for someone to have a baby right now. "make her have it at home!" i shouted, moving closer to the screen. all of the other characters were freaking their shit, grabbing their hair and jumping up and down screaming. leslie took pictures. the mother-to-be started walking out of the house. "stop her! put her in the bathroom!" "i can't, haha, i don't have control anymore." we watched as the mother and father got into a car and drove to the hospital, where everyone the laboring mother passed also starting freaking their shit. we weren't allowed to see what happened in the hospital, but a few minutes later, a new simbaby was born.

"how long do they live?"

"well, it'll take a couple of days for the baby to become a toddler. they usually live about 50-60 sims days, but if there is a skilled gardener in the household they can eat something called 'lifefruit' and extend their lives an extra day every time they eat it."

meanwhile, leslie was deciding what personality trait to assign the new baby. "let's make him...a genius."

.....i can't help but feel like someone is messing with me that way....

anyway, no baby yet in what i think is reality. but it's a full moon, so we'll see.