i'm every woman

at work, my top desk drawer will fall open if there isn't an eraser wedged into the space under the desktop. every week, i look forward to ripping off all the old tape and securing the eraser with dozens and dozens of overlapping pieces of scotch tape. after about thirty layers of this, the drawer will stay closed.

and that's how i am managing to hold things together. in general.

this weekend bridget jones, a big 'ol bowl of moosetracks ice cream, and a bottle of wine re-inspired me to pull myself together by setting unrealistic goals involving the replacement of every vice and bad habit in my life with a virtue and good habit. ha, doesn't that sound sustainable? i will spare you the boring details, but basically it includes more cardio early in the morning, fewer foods with high fructose corn syrup and saturated fat, no smoking, blah blah blah. today is day 3 of being a saint. so far so good. well, i have done one unsaintly thing; i watched "america's got talent" last night...and (even worse) enjoyed it.

wait, two unsaintly things. this one is more sad than reality television: yesterday at work i forgot my power. i made a decision on behalf of someone else. i was doing the best i could and it was a very small decision, but they ended up being hurt. it frightened me to see her look at me like that. it frightened me to realize that i can have good intentions, and yet...