how am i not myself?

days i was a saint: 5

oh well, i tried anyway.

yesterday i biked to a beach on the sound and planted myself there for the next couple hours for my self-evaluation/journal-reading birthday ritual. this resulted in two things.

one: launching myself into an existential crisis. great. i'm not surprised, as i've been feeling one on its way for a while. thank the powers-that-be for wikihow:

http://www.wikihow.com/Exude%2C-Escape%2C-or-Enact-an-Existential-Crisis
http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-an-Existential-Crisis

now i can move on. ha.

two: sunburn. really bad fever-and-chill-giving sunburn. everywhere. bad. when will i learn? never, clearly. after all the excruciating sunburn pain i've endured in my 23 years of being, i'm still a dumbass who doesn't wear sunscreen. i don't deserve sympathy, in case you were going to offer it.

i'm such a cancerian; i'm acting moody and introspective beyond all reason. my skin is as red as my hermit crab. and i'm going to get skin cancer.

hopeless.